Where to even start...I guess in the effort of being transparent and vulnerable, I should admit that spiritually December and the beginning of January have been rough. Have you ever felt that if you spent time with the Lord all your faults and inadequacies would be shown? We are all sinners and we will always fall short of the glory of God, but I didn't want to see myself as I was. I was happy enough chugging along on my own and I didn't want to see the true reflection.
Without realizing it, I had started to go blind. It was similar to the blindness I had before. The worst part being that I was choosing it. I would rather spend hours watching tv and movies, facebooking, reading nonsense or napping than to spend time with my Papa. I think it's the ugliest I've been since...Tanzania. I was still doing my 'job' ministering to people, but I was running on empty and I knew that I needed to be convicted, needed to spend time with God.
While doing my daily dose of facebooking I saw a video. You know which one, the one that went viral these past couple of weeks, Love Jesus. Hate Religion. And finally conviction struck a cord. I've had a few long-haul struggles. I've struggled what feels like all my life even on the race, when I got home and even here with it. In my lack of reflection, I had allowed it to be Lord of my life again. Shame and guilt didn't even make appearance. I found myself for weeks praying, God bring conviction without actually wanting it and definitely not expecting it.
Then, cliche as it may seem, I saw this young guy speaking about Jesus. I saw his testimony and I just saw what it meant to be 'alive in Christ.' I was overwhelmed. That's what I want to look like...fire, passion, love, joy and strong conviction for what you believe is Truth. I was smacked with the reflection of what I was not. I was living my life exactly the opposite to this. I was choosing to put back on the chains of bondage, for what? momentary satisfaction? It doesn't last, it never last. It all goes away!! The richness of food, the tartness of wine, the pleasures of this world that so easily can become addiction fade in comparison to the Glory of God...
continued on 2012 - Overwhelming Grace
Without realizing it, I had started to go blind. It was similar to the blindness I had before. The worst part being that I was choosing it. I would rather spend hours watching tv and movies, facebooking, reading nonsense or napping than to spend time with my Papa. I think it's the ugliest I've been since...Tanzania. I was still doing my 'job' ministering to people, but I was running on empty and I knew that I needed to be convicted, needed to spend time with God.
While doing my daily dose of facebooking I saw a video. You know which one, the one that went viral these past couple of weeks, Love Jesus. Hate Religion. And finally conviction struck a cord. I've had a few long-haul struggles. I've struggled what feels like all my life even on the race, when I got home and even here with it. In my lack of reflection, I had allowed it to be Lord of my life again. Shame and guilt didn't even make appearance. I found myself for weeks praying, God bring conviction without actually wanting it and definitely not expecting it.
Then, cliche as it may seem, I saw this young guy speaking about Jesus. I saw his testimony and I just saw what it meant to be 'alive in Christ.' I was overwhelmed. That's what I want to look like...fire, passion, love, joy and strong conviction for what you believe is Truth. I was smacked with the reflection of what I was not. I was living my life exactly the opposite to this. I was choosing to put back on the chains of bondage, for what? momentary satisfaction? It doesn't last, it never last. It all goes away!! The richness of food, the tartness of wine, the pleasures of this world that so easily can become addiction fade in comparison to the Glory of God...
continued on 2012 - Overwhelming Grace
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